Much of my time in the discipline office ends up being with students who are not having their best day. I truly believe there are no “bad kids,” but there certainly are poor decisions students can make that end up negatively impacting themselves and others.

All too often I see the same students over and over again, for much of the same behaviors. Sound familiar?

While I genuinely care for these students and enjoy working with them in ways that will hopefully push them further down their path toward success, our time together is often centered around their most recent infraction.

This is part of the job, of course, and I have enjoyed finding ways to positively support these students while still holding them accountable for their misjudgments. As Melissa Ugarte, founder of The Educated Edge, reminds us in an interview with Education Post, “Proper restorative training explicitly teaches educators that restorative interventions are used in collaboration with consequences to make sure that conflict has been properly discussed, and after suspension, students return to school with a safe reintegration.”

But it is becoming more evident to me that I can find more positive, proactive ways to work with these same students before they ever make it to my office. Unfortunately, much of my time is being reactive to student behaviors rather than being proactive towards improving their behaviors and experiences before they take a poor turn.

8 Proactive Strategies I’m Implementing

Here are some proactive, restorative methods I’ve tried or thought about trying, and will be more intentionally practicing in the days ahead.

• Connecting students to older peer mentors. There are some upperclassmen who have experiences that may relate to what a younger student is currently undergoing. I’ve found I can talk to students until I’m blue in the face, but the best inspirations may be more likely to come from a peer than an adult.

• Being present in the halls and classrooms. Just being around to say “hello,” “good morning,” and “have a good day” is a simple way to make a connection to a multitude of students.

• Celebrating successes. I spend a lot of time monitoring students grades and attendance. I can dig in a little more and find the positives – a hot streak of positive attendance or success on a recent assessment – that I will then go out of my way to celebrate with the student.

• Seeking positive feedback from teachers. The teachers I work with are amazing, and I typically only hear from them when things aren’t going quite right with students. I will ask teachers to keep an eye out for positive observations and to pass them along to me.

• Having lunch together. There’s magic in sharing a meal together. Joining a student with their friends at a lunch table may be awkward at first, but it can also open up insights for all of us as we interact socially with no strings attached. Treating students to lunch, too, whether at the school cafeteria or getting a local sandwich or pizza delivery, can be an easy way to share conversation over some grub.

• Including them on student feedback teams. We facilitate student feedback groups for a variety of initiatives around the school. Often these tend to consist of the same outgoing students who love being involved, but inviting students who are less likely to jump in themselves may be a simple way of saying, “Your voice matters,” and “I want to hear from YOU.”

• Jump into their gym class games. What I wouldn’t give for a gym class in my day. I enviously witness students playing sports with their friends, going outside when the weather is nice, and using their bodies in ways my office job doesn’t typically allow. Jumping in to join their games will be a good opportunity not just to enjoy the benefits of play and exercise, but also give me a chance to build bonds in a different sort of way with students.

• Ask students what their goals are and how I can help them achieve. When having conversation, just opening up to students and asking what their long-terms plans are can help pave the way for a conversation oriented around how to make the most of their time now. This allows me to be in a position of supporter and advisor towards positive goals rather than merely a disciplinarian responding to negative behaviors.

I have a short list of students who are down in my office on a consistent basis. My goal is to help these students feel they are being seen in positive moments and appreciated more as a whole person rather than just as the kid with another referral in my office. Ultimately the goal is to help them feel valued and supported, improving their overall performance and behavior…or at least making situations involving discipline a more meaningful and productive process.

I know there’s much more to it than just my own interactions with my students, but these are at least some steps I can take as an individual within the broader context of these students’ school experience.

What do you think about what I’ve listed above? What other approaches would you suggest? Let me know what you’re thinking my sending me a message or leaving a note for us all in the comments below!

Resources I liked while writing this post:

Sanzi, Erika. “What You Think You Know About Restorative Justice Is Probably Wrong.” Education Post, 28 Oct. 2019, https://educationpost.org/what-you-think-you-know-about-restorative-justice-is-probably-wrong/.

Woerkom, Marieke van. “A Proactive Approach to Discipline.” Edutopia, George Lucas Educational Foundation, 26 Oct. 2018, https://www.edutopia.org/article/proactive-approach-discipline.